So, what happened to YOUR invisible friend then?

What’s that – you never had one? Are you really sure? Okay, so maybe you didn’t have tea-parties with an invisible guest, or consciously speak to someone that was obviously never there. But – what about that inner voice?

You know the one I mean. When you used to think your most secret thoughts, ask yourself the difficult questions – that was really your inner voice that answered.

Or maybe you used to be a “Dear Diary” person, spilling out your most intimate confessions, page after page. Your best friend – always there, always ready to listen, never judgmental.

So where are they now? Or, perhaps more importantly, WHO are they now?

As a child, it’s easy to let someone imaginary take the lead in being there to listen to your problems, or even offer you advice. It’s when we get older though, that we realise just how complex the world can be, and then you really need input from another human being.

But it’s not easy. Your imaginary friend – while being just that, imaginary – is always going to be on your side. They inevitably tell you the things you want to hear; which may not be the things you NEED to hear.

You see, we all need someone. Someone we can turn to with that same degree of trust, that certainty that they’ll tell us the right thing. The trick is to remember the right thing isn’t always what you want to be told.

And unlike imaginary friends, the real ones can’t be so easily ignored if they say something you don’t like!

A coach on the other hand has a very different role to play. In a way its their job to re-activate that inner voice and give you a chance to experience that ingenuity and intuition that you used to rely on as a child.

Whilst doing some research on confidence building for gay man I stumbled across this youtube video. I quite like Jim Carey and I’m sure that this isn’t meant to be derogitory towards gay men at all, but it did make me smile. It’s quite cringe worthy to see just how being overly out to everyone doesn’t really make things easier. It really just simply demonstrates that there needs to be a little balance in everything including confidence in coming out to people.

Sometimes, I’m surprised that people avoid change like the plauge!

I can remember once my partner turning to me and in a bemused voice said

“You always see change as something positive, don’t you”, well yes I guess that I do. That’s isn’t to say that change always works out to be perfectly for me. Often it needs tweaking along the way to stop it from becoming a complete disaster!

I’ve had clients tell me that they are scared to make changes to their life as they are worried about the person they will become. This type of fear can become completely overwhelming and trap the client into their circumstances.

If you were to remain the same, would you be happy?

If you were able to overcome the issues you are putting up with today, would you be happy?

What scares you more, remaining the same or overcoming your challenges?